I posted this video a short time ago on my Facebook page. On first thought I found it funny. I like the scene at the end.
However, I started thinking more about it. This video demonstrates a lot of what is wrong in men’s lives today. There is a victim mentality that exists for men. Men say to themselves, “I have to endure this crappy job. I have to put up with my wife’s friends criticisms. Life is just miserable.”
This victim attitude then gives men permission to go out and do things. “I have a crappy job, I can steal from the company. My wife doesn’t appreciate me, I can have an affair. My live is a living hell, I will go out and buy a Harley to make myself feel better even though we can barely make the house payment.” This is a coward’s way to deal with the situation.
Men need to take responsibility for their lives. They chose that job, they chose to be married, they chose to accept the criticism. Once you make the choice, there is always the choice to stay the course or make the situation different. A responsible man always realizes the choice is his. A responsible man takes action in his life instead of reacting to situations and other people.
Here are some suggestions for a man that wants to be in charge of his life.
- He doesn’t blame others for his situation in life. Placing blame on other people or on the situation means that he doesn’t acknowledge his responsibility. He cannot expect others or external circumstances to make his happiness.
- A man doesn’t wallow in blame. Making mistakes is part of the learning process. Growth is not a steady straight ahead movement. It is a process of trial and error. The most successful men in the world have had the greatest failures before their success.
- A man is aware of competing commitments. Competing commitments explain why we choose to continue what we don’t want in our lives. There are benefits to remaining in the current situation, remember the affairs, the Harley mentioned before. Staying in self pity is comfortable. Comfort is a very strong competing commitment.
- Men know what they want and takes action. He looks deep inside to see how he wants to be different. Then he begin taking steps that will lead in that direction. Waiting for something good to happen will keep a man a victim. Taking the initiative is taking control and brings power.
- A man is aware of the multitude of choices in every situation. Choices are not usually either or, but a wide variety of possibility. And at each moment in the day, there is a choice of how the time will be spent , and how a man will feel or respond.
With choice we get freedom, we get to have passion in our lives 100%, not just a small portion where we exact our revenge.
I challenge men to stop accepting the victim mentality perpetuated in the media. We are better than this.